Fear of Commitment
Many a good hanging prevents a bad marriage.
—Twelfth Night,
Act I, Scene v
Category: Funny
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September 20
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September 19
Turnabout
When I said I would die a bachelor,
I did not think I should live till I were married.—Much Ado About Nothing,
Act II, Scene iii -
September 10
Self-Roast
If thou canst love a fellow of this temper,
whose face is not worth sun-burning,
that never looks in his glass for love of any thing he sees there…-Henry V,
Act V, Scene ii -
September 2
You Can’t Keep Up
Sir, if you spend word for word with me, I shall
make your wit bankrupt.–Two Gentlemen of Verona,
Act II, Scene iv -
August 28
It’s Not That Kind of Joke, But It Could Be
Away, you three-inch fool!
–Taming of the Shrew,
Act IV, Scene i -
August 20
Accidental Virtues
Though I am not naturally honest,
I am so sometimes by chance.-The Winter’s Tale,
Act IV, Scene iii -
August 3
Combative Cuss
You taught me language, and my profit on’t
Is I know how to curse.–The Tempest,
Act I, Scene ii
Mean Shakespeare Quotes 